The gossip of fear

Dear 20-Something,

At some point or another, we look at other people's lives and compare it to others. Not consciously, it's just something we do and sometimes it brings us down. We start to think that we should have that or that should be me by now, or my personal fave "What the in the hell am I doing wrong??" 

But, we have to understand someone else's life is not a reflection of our own. What happens for someone else, may not happen for you and that's okay. The fact of the matter is, what is for you will always be for you. So, really and truly, there is not a need to desire and go after what someone else has. For one, you don't know the story of how they got there. You don't know what they went through. You might not want to know either. The thing is, we aren't all built the same, so trying to compare your life to someone else's is a complete waste of energy. 

Sometimes we compare and become fearful. We see someone else fail and we make a vow to ourselves that we will never go down that path because failure is looming ahead. I had a conversation with my boss the one day and she asked me about my future plans. I hesitantly answered. She looked me in the eye and asked me, "What are you afraid of? What are you nervous about?" I paused for a moment and then I finally blurted out and said, "Because everyone said it was hard and I've seen people fail! I DON'T WANT TO FAIL!!" She looked at me again and said,"Have you done it yet??" I shook my head no. She responded, "So, how do you know it's hard? What may be hard for them, maybe easy for you? You can't let fear or the gossip of failure dictate your future." 

The hearsay of failure stifles the idea of achievement. You can't let fear make you stand still. Imagine if Oprah, Beyoncé, Taraji, Ava, Lupita, TIFFANY let the hearsay of failure stop them. I don't even want to think about it. Everyone is going to fail at some point or another, you just can't let it stop you. The Bible talks about failure. "A just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again.." We are constantly in development. As we develop, there will be constant talk of failure, BLOCK IT OUT!!!! Use tunnel vision to keep your eyes fixated on obtaining your goal. Because the biggest failure in life is not to even try. -Amber Jewel